Fresh Start Monday #035: Understanding small actions that loom large
Humans have a natural tendency to dwell on the past. And that extends to the future. We think of bad things that may happen or what other people may think.
We procrastinate on small tasks.
You often hear the advice to take the smallest action toward your goals. That advice makes sense on the surface, but it’s usually not pushing someone forward.
I find most clients deep down "know" what they need to do, but the real discovery is the underlying root cause of their stuckness. That’s why in a typical coaching session, we only spend roughly 5 minutes at the end on action items.
From an outside perspective, it can sometimes be obvious, but as individuals, we have a long history of identities, stories, and tendencies to sift through.
For example, I wanted to contact two people for informational coffee chats in the past month. I knew I “should” reach out, but I procrastinated for weeks.
I've long been hesitant to ask for help. It's the downside of my independence. My natural tendency is to do more research and figure out what to do. Fear of rejection plays a role as well. The sneakier stories I tell myself are, do I really even need to do this? Networking still feels forced and intimidating.
I reached out and had two wonderful 90-min coffee chats that energized me for the next steps ahead. But only when I sat down and reflected on several questions that helped me unpack my inability to take a small action.
Journal prompts for when small actions appear bigger than they are:
Focusing on the positives
What's the best-case scenario?
What good may come out of this action?2. Finding the deeper issue
Finding the deeper issue
What is behind the procrastination?
What is hard about…
Drawing confidence from the past
When have I done something similar or related in the past? What happened?